Dark days

Today I'm struggling. I sometimes have days like this and it usually comes from having a bad dream.  I have so many things bottled up. So many things that I want to say to a certain person but can't because I have been rejected from their life. Not because I have hurt them but because they have betrayed and hurt me, yet this person REJECTS me. That in its self leads to more feelings of hurt and betrayal. My other struggle is that even though I forgive this person, I feel like the hurt can never be healed because this person chooses to ignore my existence. So how do I get past this? I know many would say to just forget about this person, but this person has been in my life for 27 years. I don't know how she does it and is okay with it. Maybe out of sight out of mind works for her? :sigh: But it doesn't work for me. I wonder if she has nightmares like I do.  Probably not.

How do I heal? How do I forget about it? After 2.5 years the pain has dulled but still exists. There isn't a constant ache but days like this I am just left in a funk that seems to just linger. I am sure the pregnancy hormones does not help me in this emotional state.

Pray. That's all I can do. Pray.

"God of my pain that no one will ever see"