Reset

Hi my dearest Blog, I'm sorry it has been so long since I have sat and talked to you. Between Thanksgiving and Christmas things get a little hectic and crazy. But now that those holidays have passed, it is on to the New Year. Yes it is a new year but does anything really change? I wish it were true. I wish it was like setting a reset button and you get a fresh start at everything. All the debt disappears, all the mistakes erased and all the pain has dissolved. But we all know that that just isn't how it works. Nothing is that simple. Nothing is that easy. Nothing except the blood of Jesus! He's the only one that can reset that button. He is the only one that has paid our debt and He is the only one that can take away the pain. And He does it all for free :) The best part is that you don't have to wait for the New Year to begin in order for this to happen. God's love, grace and forgiveness is available around the clock. He is available around the clock. I know most of us already know this. at least with our head. But if we really knew it with our hearts we would go to Him more often. We would trust Him with more than just our complaints.
There are things in my life that I struggle with, right now I feel like anger and bitterness is right at my heels and at the first opportunity it tries to creep in and it tries to strangle me. I fight it constantly. I try to stay humble and remember that I am no better than anyone. Because of that I have no right to hold on to any kind of anger. But I struggle. It's hard. Especially when the people that love you are the people that cause you the worse kind of pain. I am learning more and more that we as people are all pretty much the same. We look at someone else and say " tisk tisk tisk, what a horrible person. I can't believe that they would do that or think that way" not knowing that they themselves possess that same flaw. I don't care WHO you are, you are not better than me. And I am not better than you. :sigh:  It's really all about pride. Doesn't the Bible say that Pride is the root of all sin? So maybe if I just work on that one thing, being humble. Then it will help me with all of my other sins? Maybe it would help me to forgive more. Maybe it will help me to love more? I do know that if I try to be humble and stay humble I will trust in Him more. and Oh how I need Him. "I need you God" "I need you when things are good and when things are bad. I need you when I happy and when I am sad. I need you all the time. Please come hold my hand dear Father. Stay by my side. Help me to stay humble. Help me to remember that I have no place to judge or to be angry with anyone else. No matter how dumb I think they are. We are all on a journey. I just ask Father that you will stay with me on mine. Better yet, I will stay with you on yours. I love you Father. I need you. I praise you."  Love Esther the Pester :)