Helllllo 2014! One Word

For the past 4 years, at the beginning of the year, I choose a word. A word that will motivate me spiritually, mentally and even physically. In 2010 my word was PROGRESS. I wanted to become a better wife, a better mom, a better housekeeper, and a better christian. Looking back I can say that I made a lot of progress in all of those area's but then 2011 would come along and I would soon find out that my progress was not enough.  In 2011 my word was DISCOVER, it was the perfect word for that year. That year was filled with many many changes, many heart breaks, many "firsts". My marriage was on the rocks and nearly destroyed. I truly discovered who I was at heart. In 2012 I chose the word STRONG. I have to say that I truly kept that word before me.  I faced many of my fears and overcame them. I was losing weight and getting strong. I ran 2 different 5k's.  I was rebuilding my marriage and family. I was strengthening my relationship with my Heavenly Father. It was a fantastic word for 2012. In 2013 I chose the word AGAPE. I wanted to get a better understanding of what Godly Love looked like. I wanted to have agape love for others. I have to be honest and say that I have lost sight of my word this past year. Not that I didn't show love to others, but it just wasn't something I constantly kept before me. I always hope that others can see God's love through me, especially my husband and kids. But I didn't make it my focus for the year. This year, 2014, I want to choose a word that I will truly keep before me. One that will push me, encourage me, break me and build me.

The word I chose for 2014 : ATTENTIVE.  I love the definition shown in the picture but I love the synonyms even more. I realize that I struggle to listen when people talk to me in detail.  The problem with that is that my husband and my kids do this. I always say "get to the point" or "okay and what are you trying to say". How rude right? Yah, well I need to work on that and I really am going to be more ATTENTIVE when others speak to me, especially my family. As I looked over my past words and read my blog posts, I always mention wanting to be a better Mother, Wife, Christian etc... The synonyms listed here are exactly the areas I want to be mindful of . I want to be attentive to my husband, my kids and to the Holy Spirit. I want to be aware of others needs, focused on the tasks before me, committed to the promises I make, conscientious of others feelings and wants. I want to be earnest in all that I do. I want to be a NEED FILLER. In order for me to do that I need to be attentive to those around me. Example, my little baby Benjamin was crying so I thought maybe he's tired. I went a put him in his crib. He quieted for a few minutes but cried again, this time without stopping. I knew he wasn't hungry, I had just changed him before letting him play in his jumper.... I thought I would check his diaper again, and sure enough he had a blow out, all the way up his back. Poor baby. I cleaned him up and instantly he was happy again, ready to play. I want to think that way about all the people I love. How can I help them, how can I make their day special, how can I put a smile on their face? A lot of times it starts with listening, being observant, perceptive... it starts with caring. NOW, this also counts for myself. I need to be aware of how I am feeling. I have days when maybe I haven't eaten yet and I become  HANGRY. I snap at others when I haven't eaten, or if I am tired or stressed. If I recognize that I am feeling up tight about things then I know I need to try harder to be more patient, especially with my kids. Why should they suffer my wrath simply because I haven't taken the time to take care of myself? They shouldn't. But many mornings when we are rushed for school I am barking out orders, i'm not patient with them, I'm not speaking out of love and kindness. I need to be attentive towards my speech.  I have a very dry sarcastic sense of humor. One that my husband struggles to find funny. In fact most of the time I end up hurting his feelings. I need to pay attention to my speech. How I respond. Am I annoyed about something else and just taking it out on him? These are area's I mainly need to be ATTENTIVE.  The most important area of my life that I need to be attentive towards is my spiritual walk. Am I reading my Bible, praying? Living a life that is please to my Heavenly Father? Am I being heedful of the Holy Spirit?

ATTENTIVE. 2014.